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Do you want to find out if the person you’re dating is afraid of commitment? Today, our local matchmaking team from Orange County Singles Dating Service will tell it all!

Roaming the world living the single life is great and all, but what happens when you want a little more and you want a serious relationship? Could the man or woman you’re dating be ready to settle down? If you want to know if your date is simply enjoying the moment or is serious about a commitment, this article from our experienced matchmakers will help you figure it all out.

Today, our matchmaking experts here at Orange County Singles Dating Service will review the tell-tale signs of a commitment phobe.

Irvine Matchmakers


Afraid of Commitment Sign #1- They Laugh at Your Friends

When your happily married friends, Mark and Sarah (we all wish we could be like them), invite you and your girlfriend or boyfriend for a laidback BBQ day, what does your date do? Do they burst out laughing, do they mock Mark and Sarah saying that they lead a boring monogamous life together? If they do, you might have to kiss your current partner goodbye because chances are, you are dating a commitment phobe.

If your date is often the one who is cracking jokes and laughing at your friends who are already settled down in committed relationships, it suggests that he or she does not like the idea of being responsible and settling down. It also suggests that they are afraid of a serious relationship, which is why they make fun of anyone who is involved in one.


Afraid of Commitment Sign #2- They Want to Party like Rock Stars

There is nothing more depressing than listening to a 40 plus year old man or woman talk about going downtown and partying like rock stars or how their band is going to make it big in Hollywood. The rock star lifestyle was developed for the 20 year old generation, and if your man or woman is still clinging to that lifestyle, with no hopes and dreams for the future, then don’t think for a second that this person is ready to settle down. In fact, their plans for the future probably involve getting wasted at the bars, chugging beers, and having extreme hangovers on the weekend, not that white picket fence or that Golden Retriever you might have in mind.

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Afraid of Commitment Sign #3- You Can’t Pin Them Down

If you have tickets to the latest movie or you want to make reservations to the newest trendy restaurant in town, can you find your boyfriend or girlfriend and have them join you? The average commitment phobe is a nightmare when it comes to planning for date activities and they often brush things aside by telling you, “Okay, I’ll be there,” or, “I’ll let you know as the day gets closer.” Commitment phobes don’t have a schedule and they do as they please. If you have not been able to get your man or woman to attend a date with you, something you have planned out, then it might be time to reassess the relationship. The truth is, you might have a commitment phobe on your hands.


Afraid of Commitment Sign #4- They Are Unreliable

Having someone stand you up on a date, show up late, or cancel last minute is never fun, and the truth is, it can be very humiliating. If your boyfriend or girlfriend does this to you on a regular basis, it will be frustrating and cause many relationship arguments.

So what do you do when they do this to you? If you are like a normal person, you will probably confront your flaky partner and they will most likely snap back full force at you. They will probably accuse you of being too sensitive, a drama queen, or too controlling. If you have heard those words before, then you know you’re dating a commitment phobe. Overreacting is a way of them showing you that they don’t like being tied down. Even when trying to arrange for a coffee shop date, they act defensively because they feel claustrophobic in that atmosphere.


Afraid of Commitment Sign #5- You Don’t Know Much about Them

Okay, so you’ve been dating for some time now, let’s say about six months, but you have never gone to their place or met their friends or parents. Nope, you haven’t. Why not? If your date hasn’t showed you any signs of introducing you to the people that are close to them, it’s a clear sign they want to keep their independence and don’t want to bring you into their life. This is a tell-tale sign of a commitment phobe. Commitment phobes struggle to open up and are not very public with their lives. Although this air of mystery might be attractive at the beginning stages of the relationship, our Irvine matchmakers know that six months into the relationship it can become very frustrating. We want you to remember that it will be impossible to build a serious relationship with someone who doesn’t want to open up to you.


Afraid of Commitment Sign #6- They Lose Interest

Commitment phobes love the chase but not the capture. They have a history of quick passionate relationships that end rather quickly. They are usually quick to explain that all of their past breakups are because of a former partner. If you have heard your boyfriend or girlfriend tell you that all their previous breakups were because of their ex, it’s not true. Everything was probably because of them. Our Irvine matchmakers know that commitment phobes leave the second they smell the relationship getting serious.

We know that dating a commitment phobe can be a very difficult experience, difficult and exhausting. Just keep an eye for the abovementioned signs, and if you smell a whiff of a commitment phobe, leave them right away. If you are ready to meet relationship-ready singles in Irvine, contact our matchmakers here at Orange County Singles Dating Service today. Let us introduce you to quality men who are serious about finding love and settling down.

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