Orange County Matchmakers | Why Rebounding Isn't Smart

By Orange County Singles Dating Service
Home / Dating Advice / Orange County Matchmakers | Why Rebounding Isn’t Smart

Breakups can be a gut wrenching experience.  Not only does the pain last a very long time, but it can also affect your self-esteem.  You might find it very difficult to recover from a breakup.  And perhaps that’s why so many people rebound, because they believe it’s the best way to dull the pain.

As the leading Orange County matchmakers, we know that rebound relationships are unfair and unhealthy and will never help you heal from your breakup and move forward.  If you are going through a difficult breakup right now and are thinking about rebounding, read on to find out why you should never do it.  Really, it’s not the solution to your aching heart.

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1. You could end up getting hurt again.

It is very important to be cautious about who you give your heart to.  Breakups are never pleasant.  The fact is, you’re dealing with your broken heart right now.  By rebounding, you’re putting yourself out there in the position to get hurt again.  Most rebound relationships don’t lead to love.  Rebound relationships start out fast and end just as quickly as they started, which means you could end up with another broken heart.

What can you accomplish from getting into another relationship and having your heart broken again?  Nothing, because you’ll be dealing with two heartbreaks.  If you are toying with the idea of getting into a rebound relationship, stop now—there’s still time to turn back.

Rebounding can lead to a vicious cycle of having your heart broken again and again.  You might convince yourself that you’re ready to date again, but chances are you’re not.  Sweeping your feelings under the rug instead of dealing with them will eventually come back and haunt you in the end.  Don’t allow yourself to be that person who gets into a rebound relationship cycle and never heal properly after each.

2. It’s not fair for your new partner.

Think about it for a second: how would you feel if you were dating someone who only viewed you as a rebound?  You wouldn’t like it and shouldn’t do it to anyone else.  If you are in a rebound relationship, you’re not capable of giving your new partner the love they deserve.  Your new partner might think you’re the one and fall head over heels for you, while you’re not ready to be in a long-term relationship.  You are leading this person on, which is totally unfair.

Everyone deserves to be in a relationship with a partner who is attentive and puts in their best efforts.  If you can’t give your new partner those things, then why are you dating them?  If the answer is to get over your breakup, then you’re just being selfish.

There is a strong chance this person has feelings for you and is fully invested in the relationship, but you’re not emotionally available to be in a relationship right now.  Take it from our Orange County matchmakers, it’s not healthy to rebound.

3. You need to stand on your own for a while.

If we’re being honest here, there are actually many benefits that come from a breakup.  You will learn how to be on your own and how to love your newfound independence.  If you’ve been in a relationship for a long time, chances are you neglected yourself a little.  Now is the time to work on yourself.  Instead of dating the next person that comes your way, use this time to get to know yourself better.

It is very important to know how to be alone and not depend on anyone for anything.  If you feel like you need to be in a relationship to be happy, that can lead to codependent tendencies, meaning that you rely on someone else to support you, which is not healthy.  That will not help you with your self-esteem, nor teach you how to be independent.

Enjoy your single days and experience everything you’ve been missing out on.  Being single can actually be great, as long as you use your single days in a positive and productive way.

4. You look desperate.

Rebound relationships scream desperation, and that’s not the look you want.  Like we said earlier, you don’t need anyone to validate you or make you feel like you’re important.  If you find yourself always hunting for a partner, you might want to hit the brakes and take some time away from dating.

There are more important things in life than being in a relationship, and you absolutely don’t want to appear thirsty for love.  You should be okay being single and allow yourself to heal completely from your previous relationship.  You will eventually find love, but take some time to work on yourself for now.  The right relationship will come along in due time.  Until then, say goodbye to rebound relationships.

5. Your new love interest can take advantage of you.

You just came out of a relationship and are feeling vulnerable and hurt.  Unfortunately, there are many people in the OC dating scene who are just plain trouble.  If they see that you’re desperately looking for love and want to get into a relationship right away, it might give them the perfect opportunity to take advantage of your emotional state.  Whether you’re a man or woman, the last thing you want is for someone to take advantage of you.  Don’t be easily fooled by smooth talking Casanovas or charming women who will play on your emotions to get what they want.

These are the people you want to stay away from because they are trying to take advantage of the situation you’re in today.  Don’t fall for their games.  Just because you’re technically off the market doesn’t mean you need to be available for them.  You definitely don’t need to wind up in rebound relationship and suddenly feel worse than when you started.

Instead of looking for a rebound relationship, take this time to heal properly from your last relationship.  The best way to deal with a breakup is to deal with your emotions first.  Talk to your friends, family, or even hire a therapist.  You can also write your feelings and vent your emotions that way.  You need to take care of yourself during this difficult time, so that you’ll be able to find love again.

When the time comes and you’re ready to find love again and don’t know where to turn, contact our Orange County matchmakers here at Orange County Singles Dating Service and let us make your dating transition a smooth one.

Fill out the private form at the top of the page and reserve your FREE 90 minute matchmaking consultation with the leading Orange County matchmakers today!

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